August 3, 2009

I need some advice

Recently, I found out that a dear friend of mine who I have known the majority of my life has left the church. This friend served a mission and has been active in the church all my life. I just recently found out that this friend chose to leave the church a little less than a year ago. I am confused as to what I should do. We talked for a long time and I told him/her that I was happy for them if they were happy. Was that wrong to say? I told them that I would be their friend no matter what and that I don't have any room to judge. I am happy for their happiness, but I ache inside knowing that they have no desire to return to the temple one day. I ache to know all the blessings and truths that they gave up to go a different direction in life. I love this friend with all my heart and I don't know how to deal with this news. I haven't really thought of anything else since I found out. Please to anyone out there please give me some advice help me to know what I should do and how to get over this huge boulder in my life. Thank You!

2 comments:

Matt & Ali said...

I can say i know exactly how you feel! I may have told you about one of my best friends that left the church and her marriage just this last year. It killed me... I cried like i did when Danny left. It hurt me just as bad because i had been through it and i just knew how her hubby must have felt. It hurt me to see her leave her marriage the way she did because she was the first person i ever told when i was going through crap with Danny. And she helped me. She couldn't believe the things that i went through and then did almost the same thing to her hubby but worse. She left her husband because she wasn't happy and for some other guy. She took off her garments and said she was brainwashed to believe in the gospel. I didn't want to judge her but i was so sad and hurt that she would deny it like that. She was raised by amazing parents. Her mom died of breast cancer 2 weeks after she married in the San Diego temple 2004. She claims she only did everything her whole life because she was trying to please everyone. I think that its a bunch of crap because she was such an amazing person and i don't think you could hide as well as she did that she didn't believe one thing about the gospel. It's hard to be close to her anymore. She is so different. Her standards and morals are down the drain. I always put her name in the temple when i go. It gives me peace that maybe she will come back. I think she had the hardest time telling me because she knows how in love i am with the gospel... So now i feel like she has distanced me from her. I think its because deep down she knows she is in the wrong. Her family is so hurt by it as well. Its sad to see people who are so strong fall. Pray for your friend and put her name in the temple. All we can do is be examples to them. It just goes to show us that we have to be strong and immovable in our testimonies and beliefs.

Ashlee said...

Just remaine friends with them. There is nothing worse you can do than stop the friendship. You will find, as I have, as you go through life this will happen sometimes. It's not uncommon. Most people go through a period of doubt, some come out of it okay, and others don't. Just be there for them.